Carlton Mellick III

The Haunted Vagina (Avant Punk Book Club)

Satan Burger

Known for his cute, disturbing, and utterly absurd novels, cult author Carlton Mellick III returns with a tale of childhood love and spontaneous face explosions. Ethan is in love with the weird girl in school. The one with the twitchy eyes and spiders in her hair. The one who can't sit still for even a minute and speaks in an odd squeaky voice. The one they call "Spiderweb." Although she scares all the other kids in school, Ethan thinks Spiderweb is the cutest, sweetest, most perfect girl in the world. But there's a problem. Whenever they go on a date at the Dairy Queen, her whole fucking face explodes. He's not sure why it happens. She just gets so excited that pressure builds under her skin. Then her face bursts, spraying meat and gore across the room, her eyeballs and lips landing in his strawberry sundae. At first, Ethan believes he can deal with his girlfriend's face-exploding condition. But the more he gets to know her, the weirder her condition turns out to be. And as their relationship gets serious, Ethan realizes that the only way to make it work is to become just as strange as she is. From the award-winning author of "Sweet Story" and "The Haunted Vagina," comes a twisted love story that is as creepy as it is heart-warming.

Every Time We Meet at the Dairy Queen, Your Whole Fucking Face Explodes

Four college students find themselves trapped within a creepy children's cereal commercial from the 1980s.

Spider Bunny

The Menstruating Mall

There is a grocery store. The last grocery store in the world. It stands alone in the middle of a vast wasteland that was once our world. The open sign is still illuminated, brightening the black landscape. It can be seen from miles away, even through the poisonous red ash. Every night at the exact same time, the store comes alive. It becomes exactly as it was before the world ended. Its shelves are replenished with fresh food and water. Ghostly shoppers walk the aisles. The scent of freshly baked breads can be smelled from the rust-caked parking lot. For generations, a small community of survivors, hideously mutated from the toxic atmosphere, have survived by collecting goods from the store. But it is not an easy task. Decades ago, before the world was destroyed, there was a terrible thing that happened in this place. A group of armed men in brown paper masks descended on the shopping center, massacring everyone in sight. This horrible event reoccurs every night, in the exact same manner. And the only way the wastelanders can gather enough food for their survival is to traverse the killing spree, memorize the patterns, and escape the bloodbath before it's too late. From the godfather of bizarro fiction, Carlton Mellick III, comes an absurd horror story unlike anything you've read before.

The Terrible Thing That Happens

Sally is an odd little girl. It's not because she dresses as if she's from the Edwardian era or spends most of her time playing with creepy talking dolls. It's because she chases rainbows as if they were butterflies. She believes that if she finds the end of the rainbow then magical things will happen to her-leprechauns will shower her with gold and fairies will grant her every wish. But when she actually does find the end of a rainbow one day, and is given the opportunity to wish for whatever she wants, Sally asks for something that she believes will bring joy to children all over the world. She wishes that it would rain candy forever. She had no idea that her innocent wish would lead to the extinction of all life on earth.

Sweet Story

For almost 20 years, Carlton Mellick III has been writing some of the strangest and most compelling novels the bizarro fiction genre has to offer. Described as one of the top 40 science-fiction writers under the age of 40 by The Guardian and "one of the most original novelists working today" by extreme horror legend Edward Lee. In his 57th book, Neverday, Mellick has created a dystopian horror tribute to time loop stories in the tradition of Groundhog Day, Edge of Tomorrow and Happy Death Day. Karl Lybeck has been repeating the same day over and over again, in a constant loop, for what feels like a thousand years. He's been stuck in this endless cycle for so long that he doesn't remember what his life was like before time stopped moving forward. He doesn't remember his parents' faces or what he used to do for a living. He doesn't remember which president is currently in office or what city he lives in. The only reason he remembers his own name is because it's printed on his Oregon State driver's license. He thought he was the only person trapped in this eternal hell until a woman named January appears in his backyard one morning, fleeing armed pursuers who claim to be with the police. She doesn't know why today is exactly the same as yesterday. She doesn't realize she's trapped in the same loop that Karl's been stuck within for so many centuries. But it turns out that Karl and January aren't alone. In fact, the majority of the population has been repeating the same day just as they have been. While Karl was hiding isolated in his suburban home, he didn't realize that a new world was being built just outside of his door. Society has adapted to repeating the same day over and over again. New laws have been implemented. A new memory-based currency has been put into place. Karl and January find themselves in a therapy group with other people who are having a difficult time dealing with their situation--from hospital patients with illnesses that will never be cured to parents who will never see their children grow up. But there's something not quite right about those in charge of the new repeating government. They don't understand why going into the neverday--that time period that only exists if you stay awake all night to avoid repetition--is considered the worst possible crime that anyone can commit. With the help of others who share their suspicions that something is not quite right with their situation, Karl and January explore the neverday in search of answers. But what they discover could destroy the very fabric of their new society forever.

Neverday

Tick e Polly non hanno mai incontrato i loro genitori. Sono confinati nell’appartamento dei bambini dove crescono sotto le cure dell’anziana Tata Warbourogh, nell’attesa di poter incontrare mamma e papà e andare a vivere nel resto della casa. Dopo anni di attesa ormai Polly è diventata troppo grande per i vestiti che ha nell’armadio e dei genitori non c’è ancora nessuna traccia. Quando i macchinari che rendono autosufficiente l’appartamento iniziano a guastarsi, Polly e Tick sono obbligati ad affrontare il resto della casa. Li aspetta un labirinto di stanze e corridoi in rovina, abitato da creature mostruose che cacciano nelle ombre. La ricerca dei genitori diventa una battaglia per la sopravvivenza, nella disperata speranza di trovarli prima di morire di fame. Il mondo fuori dalle poche stanze in cui sono cresciuti è molto diverso da quello che pensavano di trovare, e più attraversano la casa e più svelano misteri che non avrebbero mai voluto scoprire. Uno dei libri più intimi e toccanti della produzione di Carlton Mellick III. [Romanzo di Bizarro Fiction, collana Vaporteppa, 58.000 parole, circa 187 pagine, con in aggiunta un saggio di "Introduzione alla Bizarro Fiction" di 3800 parole a cura di Chiara Gamberetta]

La Casa sulle Sabbie Mobili

Steve Beard

D. Harlan Wilson

Jeremy Robert Johnson

Bruce Taylor

Gina Ranalli

Andre Duza

John Edward Lawson

Kevin L. Donihe

Vincent W. Sakowski

The Bizarro Starter Kit  (Orange)

The creature was finally dead. After months of fighting it, trying desperately to stop it as it rampaged across the American countryside, turning city after city into a landscape of rubble, we finally managed to beat the damned thing. We actually saved the human species. We survived. But the corpse still lingers. In the center of the city once known as Portland, Oregon, there lies a mountain of flesh. Hundreds of thousands of tons of rotting flesh. It has filled the city with disease and dead-lizard stench, contaminated the water supply with its greasy putrid fluids, clogged the air with toxic gasses so thick that you can't leave your house without the aid of a gas mask. And no one really knows quite what to do about it. A thousand-man demolition crew has been trying to clear it out one piece at a time, but after three months of work they've barely made a dent. And then there's the junkies who have started burrowing into the monster's guts, searching for a drug produced by its fire glands, setting back the excavation even longer.

The Big Meat

For almost 20 years, Carlton Mellick III has been writing some of the strangest and most compelling novels the bizarro fiction genre has to offer. Described as one of the top 40 science-fiction writers under the age of 40 by The Guardian and "one of the most original novelists working today" by extreme horror legend Edward Lee. In his 56th book, Mellick has created a surreal love story that explores the ugly and beautiful nature of relationships. Stacking Doll is the story of Benjamin Hammond, a young man who is in love with a Russian nesting doll. But in this world, nesting dolls are not just antique wooden toys. They are a race of people known as Matryoshkans, a subspecies of human who are born with a very peculiar abnormality--they have a collection of smaller people living inside of them. Benjamin never thought he'd ever fall in love with anyone, let alone a Matryoshkan, but from the moment he met Ynaria he knew she was the only one for him. Although relationships between humans and Matryoshkans are practically unheard of, the two are determined to get married despite objections from their friends and family. After meeting Ynaria's strict conservative parents, it becomes clear to Benjamin that the only way they will approve of their union is if they undergo The Trial--a matryoshkan wedding tradition where couples lock themselves in a house for several days in order to introduce each other to all of the people living inside of them. No human has ever gone through The Trial before, so Benjamin has no idea what's in store for him. He assumes that he'll love each of Ynaria's inner selves just as much as he loves her, but as she peels off her layers he realizes that each one is more neurotic and difficult to deal with than the last. And if they're ever going to be together, Benjamin must fall in love with each and every one of his fianc's inner personalities, no matter how strange or disturbing they turn out to be. From the author of Quicksand House and The Terrible Thing That Happens, comes yet another one-of-a-kind bizarro story that only Wonderland Award-winning cult author Carlton Mellick III could tell.

Stacking Doll

A Bio-Mech action horror story set on a surreal battlefield in the no man's land between Heaven and Hell.

The Boy with the Chainsaw Heart

When Satan Burger was first being passed around among teenage punks and fans of weird art and film, there was nothing else like it. A book of rebellious spirit that simplistically captured the postmodern malaise of a culture obsessed with consumerism. It quickly gained an underground following, was transcribed by fans and bootlegged online, was translated into Russian and made its way around the world attracting the attention of readers bored with typical mainstream fare. Combining a satirical wit and style on par with legendary humorists such as Kurt Vonnegut and Russell Edson with the crazy punk ethos of cult film directors such as Terry Gilliam, David Lynch, and Takashi Miike, this was a book overflowing with so many new ideas and absurd philosophies that it not only launched the career of underground author Carlton Mellick III, but inspired an entire literary movement. For the fifteenth anniversary of the release of this Bizarro Fiction classic, Eraserhead Press is thrilled to present this special hardcover edition, featuring an introduction by splatterpunk legend John Skipp, illustrations by Ryan Ward, and a new preface by the author. Satan Burger explores a new kind of apocalypse. Not an apocalypse caused by disease or nuclear war, but an apocalypse of boredom. A plague of monotony has spread across the countryside, sucking all passion and inspiration out of everyone over the age of twenty-five, leaving only the disenfranchised youth to fend for themselves in a world crumbling around them. Featuring a narrator who sees his body from a third-person perspective, a man whose flesh is dead but his body parts are alive and running amok, an overweight messiah, the personal life of the Grim Reaper, a race of women who feed on male orgasms, and a motley group of squatter punks that team up with the devil to find their place in a world that doesn't want them anymore.

Satan Burger (15th Anniversary Edition)

It is a story that has been passed down generation after generation. The story of conjoined twin goddesses floating peacefully in the middle of the sea. Many of those that have seen them, usually on calm starlit nights, swear that they are the sirens of mythology, luring sailors in to their doom. Others claim that the twins are not live women, but an ancient stone structure carved to resemble two females sitting back to back. A fewbelieve they mark the gateway tothe lost city of Atlantis, or a gateway to the spirit realm. But on all accounts there is one consistency: if you listen closely, at just the right distance, you will hear them echoing on the ghostly wind . . . dozens and dozens of meowing cats. Sea of the Patchwork Cats is a sad dreamlike tale set in the quiet ashes of the human race. A must-read for Mellick enthusiasts who also adore The Twilight Zone.

Sea of the Patchwork Cats

Razor Wire Pubic Hair

Bio Melt

A quiet, apocalyptic tale of young unrequited love in a dying world.

Mouse Trap

After the death of his wife, Ray Parker decides to get involved with the local "cuddle party" community in order to once again feel the closeness of another human being. He has no idea just how unsettling of an experience it will be until it's far too late to escape.

Snuggle Club

There is something wrong with Tori Manetti's new exercise bike. It is made from flesh and bone. It eats and breathes and poops. It was once a billionaire named Darren Oscarson who underwent years of cosmetic surgery to be transformed into a human exercise bike so that he could live out his deepest sexual fantasy. Now Tori is forced to ride him, use him as a normal piece of exercise equipment, no matter how grotesque his appearance. Set in a health food dystopia, "Exerice Bike" is an absurd horror tale of domination and submission, power and obedience, desire and desperation, from Wonderland Book Award winner Carlton Mellick III.

Carlton Mellick III

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