Name: Keeping it Real
ISBN: 9781591025399

Justina Robson

Special agent Lila Black used to be pretty, but now she's not so sure. Her body is more than half restless carbon and metal alloy machinery, a machine she's barely in control of. As for her heart, well, ever since being drawn into a game by the elfin rockstar Zal (lead singer of the No Shows), who she's been assigned to protect, she's not even sure she can trust that any more either.

Keeping it Real

The Quantum Bomb of 2015 changed everything. The fabric that kept the universe's different dimensions apart was torn and now, six years later, the people of earth exist in uneasy company with the inhabitants of, amongst others, the elven, elemental and demonic realms. Magic is real and can be even more dangerous than technology. Elves are exotic, erotic, dangerous and really bored with the constant Lord of the Rings references. Elementals are a law unto themselves and demons are best left well to themselves. Special agent Lila Black used to be pretty but now she's not so sure. Her body is now more than half restless carbon and metal alloy machinery. A machine she's barely in control of. It goes into combat mode, enough weapons for a small army springing from within itself, at the merest provocation. As for her heart . . . well ever since being drawn into a Game by the elven rockstar she's been assigned to protect, she's not even sure she can trust that anymore either.

Quantum Gravity Book One

Keeping It Real

Sarah Escorsa

☢ Friendly warning: You might suffer from gif overload while reading this review ☢

Actual rating: 2.5 ← Or 2? Or should it be 2.75? Damn. It's been almost ten days and I still don't know how to rate this. 

►► The first half of this book made me feel like this:



And like this:



And a little bit like this, too:




►► But then this happened:



I've been trying to figure out what the hell went wrong since I finished reading the book but I still can't put my finger on it. I guess it's just a combination of things that turned what could have been a BLOODY FANTASTIC book into a you-kind-of-ruined-it-all-but-I-don't-really-know-how-or-why-and-I-don't-know-what-to-make-of-it-what-a-mess experience. Sigh.



►► Okay, let me try and explain (try being the key word here). First I'll start with the AWESOME:

♦ Lila Black. Wow. Part human, part cyborg. One-woman army. The Mighty Metal Maiden. I'm in love. WOW. 

♦ Games. Not plain old games but Games. It's a cool concept. Very cool. And I'm not about to explain what it is to you, mainly because I didn't get half of it hahaha (see Confusion Section below).

♦ The most improbable mix ever: cyborgs + quantum bombs + elves + rockstars + demons + the NSA + elementals + faeries + parallel realms. Believe me when I tell you that improbable doesn't begin to cover it. But you know what? It works. And it's cool. Very cool.

►► Well it's all very cool until Lila leaves Otopia (aka good old Earth) and goes to Alfheim (aka the Elven realm). That's when the Confusion Bomb hit. Double sigh.



♦ Games. Not plain old games but Games. The problem with these Games is that the concept is pretty fantastic but poorly explained. It sometimes felt like the author herself didn't have a well-defined idea of what it was, which made it difficult for her to get it across to the reader. Sigh again? You bet.

♦ The sometimes boring, confusing mess: all of a sudden nothing made sense anymore and the story became one big blur. The author lost me with poor descriptions of places and occurrences. I didn't understand what was going on half of the time. I didn't get where the plot was going. And I certainly didn't get what the characters' motivations were or what the fish was going on between them all. Zal and Dar? Dar and Tath? Zal and Tath? Arië and Dar and Thal and Zal… And WHAT THE HELL happened between Lila and Dar?! And WHY? Argh!!! I don't get it!!! Please someone explain!!



This is were I began questioning my sanity. Well, if not my sanity, the obvious decaying state of the two grey cells I have left. We have three options here:

① I was too tired when I read this book and my aforementioned grey cells were momentarily on strike. Which might explain my absolute and utter confusion. 

② The author did make a mess of things. Which might explain my absolute and utter confusion. 

③ This was all an elaborate (and very clever) plan on the author's part. No no no, I'm not being sarcastic for once. I'm actually beginning to wonder whether this Confusion Bomb was intentionally thrown by the author. I mean, the (very corny) title for this book is Keeping it Real. As in real vs magical? As in, are the characters being real, honest and truthful or manipulative and calculating magic users? Damn. I'm getting confused all over again. And I'm probably getting as confusing as the story, too. Which might explain my absolute and utter confusion ← yeah, I know this last sentence doesn't make any sense in this particular context but it was supposed to be my little gimmick for this section so there you have it. Ha.
 


►► Now. You didn't think I'd let you go before mentioning the silly lovey-dovey stuff, now did you? Naive little you.

So. A lot of reviewers say this is romance in disguise. And guess what? I didn't think it was that aggressive. Shock! Dismay! Fainting all around! Well, to be honest, I didn't think it was that aggressive at first. Well no, it's not that I didn't think it was that aggressive, it's just that I didn't initially think romance was such a big part of the plot. Now I'm not so sure anymore. Especially after reading the last chapters. Now I think I see what the author was getting at. I think. Maybe. Probably? BOOM! And the Confusion Bomb hits once more! Because I am now beginning to think the book actually is a romance novel in disguise. It's very well hidden under layers of layers of layers of confusing layers but it's there. Lurking. Stalking. Waiting quietly in the dark to assault the unsuspecting, romance-allergy-prone reader. Arrrgggggghhhhhh!!!!!!! Someone please save me from this trap!!!!!!! Then again maybe I don't need saving. Then again maybe this is just yet another symptom of my absolute and utter confusion. Then again maybe this is just me throwing a Confusion Bomb at you. Then again maybe I've finally lost it.



Sigh. So where does that leave us? No freaking idea. Actually yes, freaking idea. Because I think I need to reread this. No no no, I'm not joking. I need to figure out whether the author actually ruined a story with amazing potential or if I was just too exhausted to grasp the absolute greatness of it all. So. Anyone in for a BR?



▧ Pre-review nonsense:

Actual rating: 2? 2.5? 3? No freaking idea. Confusion is me.



►► Crappy review to come.

P.S. the first half of the book was too good to be true, I should have known it wouldn't last.

▧ Pre-read nonsense:



✘ Corny title.
✘ Mixed reviews. 
✘ Some people say it's a romance novel in disguise *shudders* 



✔ Mix of science fiction and UF.
✔ Intriguing blurb (despite the elfin rockstar bit, which sounds pretty ridiculous).
✔ Cyborg-type heroine.
✔ Pippa DaCosta loved it.

I like to live dangerously, I think I'll give this one a try.